I am so uninsipred! I am a walking dead. :(
This is a HUGE problem for me. Not having a purpose in life. And passion. And being so unmotivated.
And I kind of know what the culprit is. Ahahhahaha.. And it starts with a big 'C'. It sound like my favourite fish that I love eating raw. Hahahahha.. Sharp ones out there would know what I am referring to. :P
I guess being made to do things that I am not passionate about 8 hours a day, 5 days a week really takes a toll on me.
I get my lazy, lethargic ass off my bed everyday to work and sit in front of my computer with no feeling purpose (even when I have things to do!) for 8 hours a day! I don't feel for how the brand is being marketed. I don't feel for the company. I don't think too highly of how the whole place is being run. I hate working for people who do not know their stuff and can't decide what they want. I don't get to use my brains!! I miss using my brains! :( It's kind of in a coma right now...sometimes I walk around not knowing what I am doing anymore. Even at home. I just walk around and do stuff like my body is on auto-pilot, my mind and heart someplace else.
Oh god, this is depressing me. I want to be sharp, alert. I want to walk around with bounce in my steps. I want to feel important. I want to have a purpose in life. I want to be sharp! I want to do so many things. I want to be passionate! I want to 'be there' when I'm there. I want to experience everything in detail and not be there in a blur. I want to store my memories in a nice, safe place in my mind and not forget every damn thing!
Sometimes when I read the papers, I don't even know what I am reading anymore. What is happening to me?!?!
HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP~!
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4 comments:
My!
I felt like i can totally relate this post to myself as well..
Unlike you i am busy all the time but beats me, i know not what i am doing most of the time..
Programming is not only foreign to me but it is just something i guess i could never begin to fathom and (probably never will)..
And talking about passion.. around here? it is unheard off..
Sigh...
But i think the best course here is to concentrate on the solution.. instead of sitting around complaining about it.. For me, there is no chance like this else where.. but for you.. you got a choice! Be wise and act fast..
Take Care and a Happpy Valentine's Day to you too.. :P
if you really feel that way.. I think it's time you go searching for a new job.
Bah! I just hate working with people who have no idea whatsoever of what they want. Send me on a wild goose chase only! Ay veel change mahy job vun day!
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